Everyday is just one big act for me/ a book that has changed me

Sep 23, 2007 at 10:27 AM
7 comments

Yea that's right, I should have four Oscars on my shelf already! Every single day I have to put on an act , I know it's a sad thing to say. Reasons for this act: I hate the way things are at the moment, and my crackpot job requires that I have such an act ( even though I hate every single individual there!, and trust me it takes allot for me to hate someone) and to add to it I detest being there I hate every aspect of it so what else can I do? So everyday I go out with the thought in mind maybe things will get better today. I head over to my new addiction Starbuks . It's like steroids, all my walls are up and the mask is on . For 7 -8 hours I have this mask on. Allot of restraint has to be exercised when you deal with certain individuals, and this gets very tiring but it's all apart of the big act. I hope someday I'll be able to go outside into the world without having to put on an act.

A book that has changed my outlook on life:
This is an amazing book, one thing I'll never forget that I read in it " what don't you like about atheist ?, they bore me . They are always talking about god."In a nut shell it's basically a story about a clown ( struggling artist) his views on life and on the Catholic church.

The Clown (Penguin Classics)

Heinrich Boll

7 comments

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Ack! That clown is skeeeery! Make heem go away!!! :(

So Quit.

[this is good]

I used to wear whatever mask was appropriate for wherever I was, everybody knew a different me, but never the real one. As you get older (i am old) you will feel more comfortable letting bits and pieces show through. But know this, when you experience life through that mask you never really experience it. : )

I get how you feel, and why you feel like that too. It's sad, but I think the world expects us to play a part of everything-is-fine. That sucks, but I suppose that it's reality. Hopefully one day you will wake up to find that it is better.

batmite! nowehere else is hiring and I need the money

You're so right Laidout, well only those close to me know what's under the mask and for now these people in this hell hole dont deserve to know. And thanks allot black :) I hope that too

you know what, just do your best. i'm a big believer that if you shine in any job, someone will take notice and doors will open. maybe in ways you don't expect or can't anticipate, but work your butt off and even if you do quit and find something better, being good at your job will have tangible rewards.

as far as having a mask, yeah: but we all do it, don't we? i think that it's just something people get used to doing and don't even realize they are doing it anymore. in some ways, it's good: you can protect your TRUE self from all the chaotic mess of real-life retail. just reminds yourself every day that your professional face is one part of you but the only part...

You're right on that mcco , I try to do my best on it but I just can't get any satisfaction whatsoever out of it. I got it in the first place thinking things would get better with it when in fact they get worst and at the moment there's nothing else But I always try to do my best at least I can have some comfort in that.
Hey Carlisa the clown is cute!

Everyday is just one big act for me/ a book that has changed me

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